JoeClarke.Net

Beware When All Men Speak Well Of You

Lebron James does not have to worry about all men speaking well of him after his gut wrenching decision last night to leave the Cleveland Cavaliers for the Miami Heat.

Lebron lived and played, and prayed in my home town of Akron, Ohio before making it to the pros as a Jordan-class phenom who skipped college in order to start in Cleveland, a mere 30 miles north of Akron. His welfare mother, Gloria, insisted that Lebron be schooled in the Catholic Saint Vincent-Saint Mary parochial schools provided by both Catholic and State monies. Lebron's mom recognized that her cute, yet fatherless, little boy would have little chance of succeeding - in anything - if left to the monstrous public school system.

It has been pure mayhem in the Akron/Cleveland and statewide media for the last few months (since the Cavs blew Game 5 of the NBA Championships). Gigantic building banners, billboards, commercials, Lebronathons, Lebron parties at stadiums and bars and every sort of grovelling imaginable, exhibited in order to tempt and seduce Lebron to stay in Ohio. Disgusting!

Everyone from President Obama, to Ohio Governor Ted Strickland to Akron Mayor Don have been begging, pleading, and even "singing" Please, Don't Go Lebron videos (which have been mysteriously removed from the net), in order to keep the Billion Dollar Baby in Ohio. However, Lebron is no baby. He just wants a championship, and now with Lebron sidling up with fellow Miami Heatians Chris Bosh and Dwayne Wade, a super trio has been formed which will triple our pleasure. Look for more 140 point games.

As Lebron was interviewed on ESPN, one could tell that it was torturous for him to make the final choice on where to play, which was not decided until yesterday morning. Shame on Clevelanders for already calling him an idiot and traitor consumed by a monstrous ego. The man is far more humble than we give credit. He's taking a 30 million dollar pay cut to join his buddies Wade and Bosh - who as a matter of fact - do not mind sharing the ball, or the glory. The speculation had always been "hot shot" Lebron would have to have the ball pried out of his cold, dead hands in order for a teammate to participate in the shootin' match. They just don't know Lebron.

It was complained before "The Decision" that Lebron could never share the court with fellow ball hogs like Bosh and Wade, who has always been described as a devout Christian. The day before Lebron left for Connecticut to make The Decision he was scrimmaging at his old High School St Vincent-St. Mary, no doubt, to gather some of his thoughts at the place where the magic (actually blessing) began for him earlier in his yet short life.

The Mayor of Akron, Don Plusquellic, fully engaged in Lebron-worship attitude, moseyed up to the Catholic school hoping to impress Lebron to stay in his hometown of Akron, but the Stage Door Donny was not successful.

I hope the best for Lebron, who was visibly shaken at his interview, and I am relieved that the endless Lebronathon has ended. Maybe, Northeastern Ohio can start concentrating on allowing for the creation of jobs, in lieu of Lebron, to reignite the economy by neutering the over powerful unions here and neutering the excessive taxation on business.

[PS I do wish Lebron would get a little Divine nudge (if he's listening) and make it legal with his girlfriend - at least for the sake of his two beautiful children, and the lovely lady]